There's nothing like a mother's love

In honor of my mother, who passed away early this morning, and because Mother's Day is approaching, I want to share a talk I gave for Mother's Day in 2008, five years ago. Below are my speaking notes (I didn't use a printed text), so the outline near the end doesn't include all the stories I told. I apologize for that omission, but that's how I gave this one. Mom, we will miss you, and we look forward to being with you again.

It’s a privilege to speak on Mother’s Day.

It is difficult to properly express the reverence and respect I have for women. You bless our lives in so many ways, and we men have difficulty demonstrating our gratitude. But be assured, sisters, that we do love and appreciate you.

My mother helped me to develop a love of good poetry, so I would like to share a few poems about mothers today. The first is a fun one that we can all relate to:

Mothers are people who cook things,

Like breakfast or lunch or a snack;

Dexterous people who hook things

Which button or zip up the back.

Mothers are people who blow things,

Balloons and kisses and noses;

Green-thumbish people who grow things,

Like ivy and puppies and roses.

Mothers are people who send things,

Like letters and strawberry tarts;

Magical people who mend things,

Like blue jeans and elbows and hearts.

Mothers are people who find things,

Like mittens and homework and germs;

Fussbudget people who mind things,

Like cusswords and snowballs and worms.

Mothers are people who sweep things,

Like porches and cobwebs and rugs;

Softhearted people who keep things,

Like artwork, report cards, and hugs.

Mothers are people who nurse things,

A boy or a girl or a spouse;

And, all in all, there are worse things

Than mothers to have in your house.

I would like to share a well-known poem that has always meant a lot to me:

I had a mother who read to me
Sagas of pirates who scoured the sea,
Cutlasses clenched in their yellow teeth,
"Blackbirds" stowed in the hold beneath.

I had a Mother who read me lays
Of ancient and gallant and golden days;
Stories of Marmion and Ivanhoe,
Which every boy has a right to know.

I had a Mother who read me tales
Of Gelert the hound of the hills of Wales,
True to his trust till his tragic death,
Faithfulness blent with his final breath.

I had a Mother who read me the things
That wholesome life to the boy heart brings--
Stories that stir with an upward touch,
Oh, that each mother of boys were such!

You may have tangible wealth untold;
Caskets of jewels and coffers of gold.
Richer than I you can never be--
I had a Mother who read to me.

(Strickland Gillilan)

And another poem:

  BLESSINGS on the hand of women!
        Angels guard its strength and grace.
      In the palace, cottage, hovel,
          Oh, no matter where the place;
      Would that never storms assailed it,
          Rainbows ever gently curled,
      For the hand that rocks the cradle
          Is the hand that rules the world.

      Infancy's the tender fountain,
          Power may with beauty flow,
      Mothers first to guide the streamlets,
          From them souls unresting grow—
      Grow on for the good or evil,
          Sunshine streamed or evil hurled,
      For the hand that rocks the cradle
          Is the hand that rules the world.

      Woman, how divine your mission,
          Here upon our natal sod;
      Keep—oh, keep the young heart open
          Always to the breath of God!
      All true trophies of the ages
          Are from mother-love impearled,
      For the hand that rocks the cradle
          Is the hand that rules the world.

      Blessings on the hand of women!
          Fathers, sons, and daughters cry,
      And the sacred song is mingled
          With the worship in the sky—
      Mingles where no tempest darkens,
          Rainbows evermore are hurled;
      For the hand that rocks the cradle
          Is the hand that rules the world.

            (William Ross Wallace)

A mother’s influence is felt for generations.

In the Proclamation on the Family, we read:

            “Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. . . . Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to love and serve one another, to observe the commandments of God and to be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. . . . Successful . . . families are established and maintained on the principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities.”

Please note that these are shared responsibilities. Then the individual responsibilities are mentioned:

            “By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children.”

All these responsibilities are suited to our God-given natures. The father is the provider and presider, and the mother is the nurturer.

Mothers are our best examples of Christ-like service and sacrifice. They exemplify, better than any others, the first and second great commandments: to love God and keep his commandments, and to love our neighbors as ourselves. It is no surprise that a man would ask the Savior about these commandments: I think the women already knew.

I was blessed to be born to a noble mother. I have also been blessed with a noble wife. What I have become in my life is largely due to their refining influence, combined with Heavenly Father’s blessings.

I would like to focus on my mother’s contributions.

1. HIGH EXPECTATIONS.
1. Vision of my potential
2. No half-hearted efforts allowed (even mowing lawn)
3. Pushed me to do well in my studies, Scouting, etc.
4. Encouraged us to develop our talents
5. Mission, temple marriage, etc. were expected
6. Praise always followed the little improvements, and still does
2. TEACHING.
1. Helped me learn to read
2. Regular trips to the library
3. Needlework: a career skill
4. Taught us the gospel
3. CHURCH ACTIVITY.
1. We attended our meetings---happily
2. She was not afraid of challenging callings:
   i. Primary

ii. Scouting

iii. Relief Society Queen

iv. Young Women

3. Temple attendance.
4. Supported my Dad in his callings: I don’t ever remember hearing complaints
5. Supported us in our church activities
3. SERVICE.
1. Mom has lived her life in the kitchen
2. In addition to delivering food & treats, also sewed, quilted, etc. for others
4. INTUITION.
1. Mom always knew what was going on
2. Fur-lined cookie jar
3. Mission illness
4. Many other times
5. LOVE.
1. There was never any question that Mom loved us
2. Even when we disappointed her
3. There was never any question she loved Dad
4. Prayed frequently for us
5. Breakfast before seminary
6. SHE DIDN’T:
1. overindulge us
2. compare us to others
3. criticize

I closed with some quotes from the prophets, which I cannot locate. But if you really want some good ones, here are a few:

“The true strength that is America's, the true strength of any nation, lies in those qualities of character that have been acquired for the most part by children taught in the quiet, simple, everyday manner of mothers. What Jean Paul Richter once declared of fathers is even more true of mothers-and I paraphrase it just a little to make the point-"What a mother says to her children is not heard by the world, but it will be heard by posterity."   

God bless you, mothers. When all the victories and defeats of men's efforts are tallied, when the dust of life's battles begins to settle, when all for which we labor so hard in this world of conquest fades before our eyes, you will be there, you must be there, as the strength for a new generation, the ever-improving onward movement of the race.” (Salt Lake Exchange Club Mother's Day Program, May 11, 1977.)    -Gordon B. Hinckley

“You mothers, read to your children. Read the scriptures to your children. You may not think they understand. They won't understand everything you read. But they will develop within themselves a feeling, an attitude, a spirit that will be wonderful. And I don't hesitate to promise you that the day will come, if you nurture your children and love and teach in righteousness, you will get on your knees with tears in your eyes and thank the Lord for His blessing to you. (Nottingham England Fireside, August 30, 1995.)   

To you wives and mothers who work to maintain stable homes where there is an environment of love and respect and appreciation I say, the Lord bless you. Regardless of your circumstances, walk with faith. Rear your children in light and truth. Teach them to pray while they are young. Read to them from the scriptures even though they may not understand all that you read. Teach them to pay their tithes and offerings on the first money they ever receive. Let this practice become a habit in their lives. Teach your sons to honor womanhood. Teach your daughters to walk in virtue. Accept responsibility in the Church, and trust in the Lord to make you equal to any call you may receive. Your example will set a pattern for your children. Reach out in love to those in distress and need. . . .   

It is the home which produces the nursery stock of new generations. I hope that you mothers will realize that when all is said and done, you have no more compelling responsibility, nor any laden with greater rewards, than the nurture you give your children in an environment of security, peace, companionship, love, and motivation to grow and do well.

The more surely you rear your children in the ways of the gospel of Jesus Christ, with love and high expectation, the more likely that there will be peace in their lives.   

Set an example for them. That will mean more than all the teaching you can give them. Do not overindulge them. Let them grow up with respect for and understanding of the meaning of labor, of working and contributing to the home and its surroundings, with some way of earning some of their own expense money. Let your sons save for missions, and encourage them to prepare themselves, not only financially, but spiritually and in an attitude to go out to serve the Lord without selfishness of any kind. I do not hesitate to promise that if you will do so, you will have reason to count your blessings. . . .    

May the Lord bless you, my beloved sisters. You are the guardians of the hearth. You are the bearers of the children. You are they who nurture them and establish within them the habits of their lives. No other work reaches so close to divinity as does the nurturing of the sons and daughters of God. ("Stand Strong against the Wiles of the World," Ensign, November 1995, pp. 99-101.)   ” ("Stand Strong against the Wiles of the World," Ensign, November 1995, p. 99.)    -Gordon B. Hinckley

“The positive influence of mothers is priceless. I say to you mothers, if you ever have sons and daughters who amount to what they should in the world, it will be in no small degree due to the fact that your children have a mother who spends many nights on her knees in prayer, praying God that her son, her daughter, will not fail. I remember at the foolish years of my teenage life, my mother came to me with an intuitive impression and warning which I brushed off as foolish teenagers do. "Oh, Mother, that's silly," I said, then within only a month, to stand face-to-face with the temptation about which Mother had warned. I never had the courage to go back and tell her how right she was, but I was on guard because someone warned-my mother.” (63-09, p. 85)   -Harold B. Lee